Hammer on Anvil '

Have you ever been frustrated that you don't seem to be progressing in your spiritual life? I know I have. Sometimes I feel as though I take a giant leap forward in my walk with God, only to subsequently take three or four steps backward. I feel like I must be the most obtuse, rebellious child God has ever had to discipline!

Last week a verse from James came to my attention over and over again: "Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you" (4:7). I have read this verse and heard it many times, but the Holy Spirit kept speaking it to me last week. It became obvious as time went on that I needed to do some major housecleaning in my soul, and I set out to do just that.

In previous blogs I have confessed to having a problem with anger. Extreme vulnerability and helplessness from the time I was very young caused me to erect barriers of anger. You see, when you are angry, you don't appear to be so vulnerable. It's a defense mechanism that I learned to master for my own survival.

I know anger itself is not a sin, but rather a God-given emotion. Feeling anger is not a problem. But if you suppress it (as I did for years) or do not learn to express it in a healthy way, it can take over your life. When God showed me that's what was happening to me, I knew something had to be done. But what? I have known Jesus for decades, and still struggled with this issue.

The answer came as I was reading Annie Chapman's Letting Go of Anger. First, I was reminded of a very important truth:

Absolutely nothing, including that which stirred up a fierce anger, can touch me without first passing through the filter of His loving hands. God wants to use everything that comes into our lives to conform us into the image of Jesus.

Yes, everything. And Annie should know. She was cruelly raped by one of her father's farm hands when she was five years old. Fewer things inspire rage like the brutal robbing of a child's innocence and trust. Yet Annie has worked through her anger and now helps others to do the same -- including me.

The statement God used to pierce my heart was this one:

As long as we hold on to things like anger and our perceived "right" to be accommodated, we will never progress in our spiritual life.

There it was in black and white. I asked God why I didn't seem to be progressing, and He showed me through this book. When I read this statement, He reminded me again of the verse from James, and told me I had not submitted to Him completely. He showed me I have not learned to trust Him, because I still feel the need to protect myself from being vulnerable. Though I knew the anger was wrong, I had no idea how to be rid of it. I had used it as my suit of armor for decades; wouldn't I be vulnerable again if I removed it?

Yes, I had tried "resisting the devil" so he would flee. But that's another important lesson I learned from Annie's book. Notice in James 4:7 the specific order; first you are to submit yourself to God, and then resist the devil. If you try to come against Satan without having first submitted to God, you'll end up like the seven sons of Sceva:

Some Jews who went around driving out evil spirits tried to invoke the name of the Lord Jesus over those who were demon-possessed. They would say, “In the name of the Jesus whom Paul preaches, I command you to come out.” Seven sons of Sceva, a Jewish chief priest, were doing this. One day the evil spirit answered them, “Jesus I know, and Paul I know about, but who are you?”  Then the man who had the evil spirit jumped on them and overpowered them all. He gave them such a beating that they ran out of the house naked and bleeding.

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28).

Listening to Christian radio, hearing testimonies of people touched by God, and sometimes even attending Sunday worship can leave the wrong impression on a person. As I drove in to my office today, I kept hearing the same message: your relationship with God cleanses you and takes away your troubles. While I believe that nothing in this world can cleanse you like God's forgiveness, I think the Christian world does a disservice to unbelievers by pushing the message that your sins go away and your life is filled with joy and happiness ever after.

I am a 15-year follower of God. I am a Sunday school teacher, a youth worker, and, I hope, a woman after God's heart. Despite all these things, I still have pain. I still suffer sorrow, hurt, and loss. I struggle with guilt over my sin, and laziness in my relationship with God. Some days, I still crawl out of bed desperately hoping I could just make it through the day. God's love, mercy and grace covers all this, but it doesn't take it away.

I heard part of a speech by Beth Moore this morning that went something like this: "Once you've experienced God's hand touching your life, making you someone you could never be on your own, nothing is important enough to risk that. Nothing illicit, nothing worldly is worth coming before Him." As I listened to this, I found myself thinking, "If that's the case, why do I keep finding things that seem to be able to do just that?" Toby Mac sang, "I was made to love You" this morning, and my inner response was, "If that's the case, why is it so hard to do?"

I think it's only fair to be truthful to people I want to see come to Jesus, and this is the hard truth. First, accepting God's gift of forgiveness and being adopted into His family does not fix you. Second, following Jesus is the most difficult thing you will ever do, if you do it right. It means removing things from your life that will trail behind you like toilet paper stuck to your foot. It means committing and re-committing your life to Him; sometimes with a, "Good morning, God...I need you this morning", and sometimes on your knees because you've wandered away again. Satan will use your past against you at every opportunity. It requires a passionate pursuit that takes up your whole self. A relationship with God demands surrender of your desires, your marriage, your family, your job...everything you are to His control. Anyone who believes that is easy will be in for a rude awakening.

Just as I was about to give up on the Christian radio this morning, I heard something a little different. God heard my questions, and He responded with exactly what I needed to hear. I want to share the song that God wrote for me just for this morning. Maybe He wrote it for you, too.

Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy Name! (Psalm 103:1).

We just celebrated our national day of giving thanks. I wonder how many of us took the time to ponder the immeasurable blessings that have been poured out upon us by our heavenly Father. And I'm not talking about all the wonderful tangible blessings like treasured relationships.

God has blessed me with family, friends, mentors and mentees, and staggering ministry opportunities. I never cease to be humbled by the responsibility He seems to think I can take on. Beyond that, He has blessed my husband and me materially; we live in a nice home that He has enabled us to expand to meet the needs of people who come to stay with us on a fairly regular basis.

But even if I didn't have all these tangible blessings -- even if I lived alone in a tiny apartment and had no children or grandchildren, and very few material possessions, I have reason to bless the Lord as long as there is breath in me. Why? Because Jesus has delivered me from death! Ephesians 2:6 says, "God raised us up with Christ and seated us with Him in the heavenly realms" (emphasis mine). Think about that for a minute. We know that Jesus sits at the very right hand of God, and this Scripture states that we are seated right there with Him! Folks, if we had nothing else in our lives for which to give thanks, this one thing should keep us singing for all eternity.

I have a confession to make. For as long as I can remember, I have struggled with anger. Through lots of reading and sound counsel, I have learned that anger is often a defense mechanism when somebody lives in fear. That explains how it all started with me; my mother was very physically and emotionally abusive, and I remember waking up in the morning fearful of what sort of mood she might be in.

Because of the abuse, I had virtually no self-esteem growing up, which led to abuse in other venues -- most notably when a church deacon molested me. Other things happened, too, but it is not necessary to mention them all. Suffice it to say that many things have occurred in my life that would appear to justify my anger.

Now, though, my life is such that I have no legitimate reason to be angry. Yet anger from the past oftentimes rears its ugly head, and it is a constant battle to exercise 2 Corinthians 10:5 and take my thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ. I have to remind myself regularly to "Bless the Lord, oh my soul." And I am discovering that as I lift my voice in praise to Him, anger dissipates. It is slowly losing its hold on my life, and I covet your prayers that one day it will be completely gone.

If you are given to anger or a critical spirit, or if you find yourself complaining a lot, I encourage you to begin incorporating this Scripture into your life -- a hundred times a day if necessary. When you are tempted to lose control, take a deep breath, focus on God, and say, "Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy Name!" In this Psalm, David commanded his soul to praise the Lord -- leading us to believe that he did not feel like praising the Lord. But we are not to be ruled by our emotions. Oswald Chambers says, "Take yourself by the scruff of the neck and shake off your incarnate laziness," and that is precisely what we need to do when it comes to being formed in the image of our Creator.

This week, begin by making a list of everything for which you are thankful -- most notably the gift of Jesus Christ, who has redeemed your soul from death. Ask Him to give you a thankful heart, and begin to praise Him. Though many ugly things have happened in my life over which I had no control, and I myself have done things I am not proud to admit, I echo John Mark McMillan's wonderful sentiment: "I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way that He loves us" (from "How He Loves").

I love the verse “as iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”  Proverbs 27:17
Today I see it in a completely different light.  
I wonder if there is more to the verse than we are reading…   
I have always really held this verse closely as an accountability verse; we need people in our lives that sharpen us.  We need people in our lives that hold us to a higher standard.  
But does iron really sharpen iron?
My understanding is that iron really dulls iron – Is it impossible for two items of the same core strength to sharpen each other?

What if this proverb was looked at more simplistic and logical?  After all, isn’t that what the proverbs are simple yet logical observations in live?
What if it were not looked at through a positive, affirming light?
We understand that many of the proverbs are somewhat witty, if not completely satirical.  We also understand that God has a sense of humor and a unique way of pointing us back to Him.

So – does iron sharpen iron?  No it just creates heat and creates dullness.