Hammer on Anvil '

For the single dudes out there this is geared towards you. Your responsibility in relationship with or in regards to women requires a high degree intentionality. It starts right at the get go of our interactions with women by keeping our eyes from wandering and our minds to drifting when a beautiful woman walks by or while we're talking with them. This basic level of respect must be established so that we can build up that boundary for where our heart and mind are at while we're with a woman in public. Once we are in private with a woman whether it's just a friend or a love interest, which by the way those lines tend to blur the closer we are emotionally to a woman and the older we get, then the tougher it is to practice discipline physically that we have not practiced mentally. I'm not implying the simple practice of a mental discipline beforehand is enough to keep your blood from pumping and for the temptation to be easy to resist, but it is much the same in principle as hiding the word in your heart. Can the man who does not study the word of God remember a verse or recall a teaching in the midst of adversity when he needs those words the most and they would apply to his situation the greatest? It is part of the foundation. Another part of the foundation is recognition that until you are married no matter how sure you are that you will marry this person or of your love for them that until that wedding vow they are in your care as a precious item and not as something to be taken advantage of. Ask yourself if you were to break up with Ms. Right would you have made it harder or easier for the next guy behind you to go to the next step with her and put her closer to getting in even deeper with the next guy further down the line. ie. If you felt up a girl and did nothing else do you feel ok because you didn't have sex? What about if you broke up, do you think it will be easier or harder for the guy next in line to have sex with her? Can you say you've acted with such self control that this woman after seeing your example knows that there are men of extreme character and integrity out there and encourages her not to settle, but to hold out for such a man and such a marriage? Familiarity is a tough thing to reel back in and especially for women as that is such an emotional connection and much more than just physically satisfying. It is an insult to your friendship and to her beauty to be so careless. Though a friend with benefits seems very tempting and loneliness can be a powerful motivator resist the temptation to cross that line and build familiarity in a place that will put your friend in a worse position with another person after you've long moved on from them. If you find yourself dating someone do whatever you can to operate transparently. Be truthful with yourselves and if you can't be alone together and feel like you'll be able to resist temptation then don't be alone. If you're in a situation that leads you closer to the brink, then seek out accountability before you fall off the edge. Don't just casually walk away, but intentionally flee from sin. In the end you'll develop friendships with women that will give them a clearer picture of who Christ is and what they should be expecting out of a future husband. If it's you then that's great and if it's not then how fantastic for them to be able to say they waited for God's man, because they saw Christ in you and knew what to look for.